*is still alive due to mutant Dr Pepper stuff*
STRIKE ME DOWN SHALL YOU!
*revives Lazlo*
THEN I HAVE BUT ONE THING TO SAY!
THE EVIL DUDES DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOU. THE EVIL DUDES DO NOT CARE ABOUT LIFE ITSELF. THE EVIL DUDES CARE ONLY ABOUT DORITOS AND KILLING. THE EVIL DUDES ARE GOING TO RUIN YOUR FUN WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. IT IS FUTILE TO TRY AND STAND UP AGAINST THE EVIL DUDES. IF YOU DO NOT STAND IN THE WAY OF THE EVIL DUDES YOU MAY BE KILLED SECOND INSTEAD OF FIRST. THE EVIL DUDES ARE COOL. THE EVIL DUDES HAVE A SECRET BASE AND YOU DON'T. THE EVIL DUDES GET TO RIDE IN A HEAVILY ARMED TEDDY BEAR THAT CAN SHAPE SHIFT AND HAS BEEN DEEMED ILLEGAL BY THE GOVERNMENT WHILE YOU ALL RIDE IN YOUR CRAPPY-LOOKING STATION WAGONS. THE EVIL DUDES CAN DO ANYTHING. YOU CAN NOT DO ANYTHING BECAUSE THE EVIL DUDES DO NOT ALLOW YOU TO. THE COOKIES HAVE NOT GONE TO HERSHEY'S COOKIES N CREAM CANDY BARS. THEY HAVE GONE INTO THE PALMS OF THE EVIL DUDES. ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US IS A REALLY STUPID STATEMENT. THE EVIL DUDES HAVE KILLED THE MORON THAT ALLOWED THIS ACT OF PATHETIC TRANSLATION TO GET INTO THE FEEBLE MINDS OF ALL OTHERS BESIDES THE EVIL DUDES. THE EVIL DUDES MEAN EVERYTHING TO YOU. THE EVIL DUDES ARE THE SUGAR IN YOUR COFFEE. THE EVIL DUDES ARE THE BATTERIES IN YOUR VIBRATOR. THE EVIL DUDES PUT THE N IN NINTENDO. THE EVIL DUDES ARE COOL. YOU MAY NOT JOIN THE EVIL DUDES. THE EVIL DUDES DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH COMFY CHAIRS INSIDE THEIR MACHINES. THE EVIL DUDES DO NOT GIVE A FLYING **** IF THAT MAKES YOU UNHAPPY. THE EVIL DUDES LIKE TO SEE YOU UNHAPPY. THE EVIL DUDES ALREADY RULE THE WORLD. YOU DO NOT KNOW THIS BECAUSE YOU ARE STUPID. YOU COULD WALK OUTSIDE ONLY TO BE STEPPED ON. IF YOU WALK OUTSIDE THIS VERY MINUTE AND ARE NOT IMMEDIATELY KILLED IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE LUCKY. DO NOT RALLY AGAINST THE EVIL DUDES. SUBMIT TO THE EVIL DUDES.