This topic fails because it forgets the truth about santa.
1000 years ago, crazy europeans were fighting the indians for control of the north poll. They Indian forces were lead by a man named chief Santa Clause. He was the greatest general of his era, being the first westerner to be trained by ninjas, pirates, and then pirate ninjas.
The odds were agains him and his rag tag group of warriers, but they didn't want to be ruled by the white people. So they fought and actually were winning for some time. The pirate\ninja\pirateninja skills of santa assured that the North Pole indians would keep their land. The european powers were forced to make peace, santas "mad skillz" as they were called were too much for them. The treaty of the north was signed.
Unfortunatly as with most treatys signed between white people and other races, it was soon to be broken. A gruff new military general came into power, his name...Hanukah Sam. It showed how desprate the european powers were, they hired the first and only jewish general for a long time to lead their forces. Hanukah Sam decided to send his forces to seige the north poll on christman night, december 25.
War once again stained the friged snow of the north poll. Santa was caught off guard and his forces were almost completly demolished as they slept. They were pushed far back into the poll of the north, where santa lead his last stand. The counters pulled by Mr.Clause were extremly effective. He was able to successfully push the invaders back.
It seemed as if the battle was won but Hanukah Sam expected Santa to push back that force, santa had run into a trap. Only santa survived, the whities wanted him alive.
As punishment for defending his land against European powers Santa was forced to have the children of his land work for an entire year and make toys. On the anniversary of his defeat Santa was forced to deliver the toys into the houses of Europe.
Using magic, the wizzard Merlin made santa imortal and gave him magic raindeer to make the trip quicker. His people eventually adapted to become all midgets due to mal nurishment and they still make toys to this day.
Now thats the story of Santa.
